The Foolish, Isolated Pastor

And you say, “How I have hated discipline! And my heart spurned reproof! I have not listened to the voice of my instructors, And I have not inclined my ear to my teachers!”  (Proverbs 5:12–13, LSB)

This week I began recording a series in our IFCA podcast Advancing the Cause asking the question: Who Shepherds the Pastor? In this series, I am hoping to draw attention to the fact that all followers of Christ, pastors and elders included, need to have someone (preferably a few people) who watches over their soul.

This morning’s Scripture reading once again brought this necessity to my mind in the context of a father (Solomon) warning his sons about the lure of adultery.

Solomon imparts wise words on how to avoid the pitfalls of lust and adulterous relationships. He employs the eventual fate of the adulterer as a deterrent, illustrating the consequences of disregarding this wisdom and remaining faithful to marriage vows.

Solomon’s words apply to more than the destructive effect of adultery. In fact, they are applicable to everyone who comes to the end of their foolish ways and begins to regret their unwillingness to listen to the voices of reason and warning that preceded their downfall.

In regard to church leaders, this is a particular danger. Some pastors, by virtue of their small church, are often the lone leader. Others, by design, have isolated themselves from any other critics. Either way, the results are the same—words of warning are either unspoken or silenced.

I can’t think of anyone I know who enjoys being confronted for their sin. Confrontation is like good medicine. It’s bitter, but it helps where needed. We take it because we know the alternative is worse.

In reality, biblical counsel is beneficial. However, the challenge for many is that we understand the right things intellectually, yet we turn our hearts away, much like a young child turning away from the bitter syrup in a spoon, lips tightly pressed in rebellious refusal. While this child’s behavior may be considered childish if they are too young to comprehend the consequences of refusing their medicine, if they are old enough to understand and still resist, their childishness has transformed into foolishness.

Pastors are not naive or spiritual children. Instead, they understand the profound impact of the Word on the heart’s pain and brokenness caused by sin. However, they often take on the role of spiritual mother rather than the stubborn child. At least, that’s what we commonly believe.

Perhaps we’ve fallen prey to a subtle deception that acknowledges our imperfections, as all redeemed Christians do, yet still struggles with sin… but not excessively. Our congregants require the medicine, but we, we’re too mature to need it frequently. But is that truly the case?

If you’re a spiritual leader in the Church, you need someone to watch over your soul. Just like a medical doctor, who is still susceptible to illness, his medical expertise and training don’t prevent common colds. Physicians require the guidance of other physicians. Similarly, pastors need to be pastored. We need someone to use the rod and staff to guide and correct us through the Word of God.

To avoid such a relationship is foolish. Rejecting correction and warnings will lead us to a similar fate as the adulterer in Proverbs 5:12-14. As God’s children, we all need each other. Don’t believe the lie that you’re an exception. There are no exceptions. Don’t become the foolish, isolated Christians who, one day, look up and find their life in shambles, with their family and ministry forfeited because they refused to listen.

Guard your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23, LSB)

Dealing Honestly with Criticism in the Ministry (weekend post)

Criticism is a hard thing to deal with. This past week as I was digging through some old files on my computer I found a file that I had labeled “problems.” I currently have a paper file labeled the same in my desk drawer where complaint letters are kept. Thankfully it doesn’t have too many letters in it…yet.

Going back to the other day, I knew that I shouldn’t open the file and look inside, but curiosity got the better of me and I did. Inside I found some letters from when I was a pastor in California. The memories of those occasions had mercifully faded, but the letters instantly brought back those difficult days.

Read the rest of the post here: Dealing Honestly with Criticism in Ministry

Dealing Honestly with Criticism in Ministry

Criticism is a hard thing to deal with. This past week as I was digging through some old files on my computer I found a file that I had labeled “problems.” I currently have a paper file labeled the same in my desk drawer where complaint letters are kept. Thankfully it doesn’t have too many letters in it…yet.

Going back to the other day, I knew that I shouldn’t open the file and look inside, but curiosity got the better of me and I did. Inside I found some letters from when I was a pastor in California. The memories of those occasions had mercifully faded, but the letters instantly brought back those difficult days.

As I reviewed the contents, I could feel myself growing anxious as I repeated in my mind the answers to the harsh and unfair things written in them. Although there may have been small bits of truth sprinkled throughout, these letters represented the worst of the problem issues in my ministry.

You see, whenever someone has come to me with an issue, although it would be easier to push off the person by ignoring them, or tell myself that I know better because God has called me as the pastor of the church, I know that this would be foolish. I have tried to give everyone a hearing who comes and brings a complaint—and often I have had to humble myself and ask forgiveness when I have been wrong. Sometimes I am partially wrong or there has been a misunderstanding. If that is the case, I then have an opportunity to set things right and correct the error-either in them or myself, or both of us.

But these files I have often marked times when a person had come with sinful intent in their heart. They may have been bitter, sinfully angry, or even divisive. Many times they may have also been too cowardly to even speak to me personally and had emailed their complaint. I kept those emails and letters as a record of their words in case the issues needed to be further addressed with discipline, or maybe several meetings so that we could work through the underlying issues that are sometimes at the root of the problems.

The old files reminded me of something else. I am reminded in times when venom has been spewed at me by those who at one time professed to love me and the church, that it is possible—even as a Christian—to become so bitter and angry that we become a pawn in the hands of our enemy. He uses such embittered Christians to sow discord and division in Christ’s Church.

Not every complaint or criticism should be viewed in this way. But when we have truthfully evaluated the complaints brought to us and see that the heart of the complainer has succumbed to the root of bitterness, we must put aside the complaint, leaving it to the Lord. And we must guard our own hearts against becoming bitter ourselves. Instead we must pray that the Lord would free our embittered brethren from their anger, and we must long to see the day when we will be reconciled—whether in this life or the life to come.